Who's the Hero?!

"For those who believe in Him, this be as you may feel it,
And for those who don't, be it divine fiction."

A weekend at home without parents is pretty boring, indeed. But Sundays are always exciting, especially by the evenings for I am all set to shower my love for Him through bhajans and to receive His grace for the week to come.

I returned from one such inspiring bhajan session and really wanted a soothing cup of ginger honey tea. I walked into the kitchen, humming the lines of the song I had just sung - Sai matha pitha Dheena Bandhu sakha, as I watched Him smile at me from the wall across. I smiled back, and felt a tear trickle down when I sang "tere charanon mein sai mera koti pranaam...".

With a "not so bad" cup of tea in hand, I settled down on the couch making up my mind whether to switch on the TV or not. I decided to go on and check if there were any good English animations playing and the green sensor light on the TV set flashed. My speakers jarred as the Sun Music channel popped up with one little monkey like hero jumping for "pottu thaaku". (I know you guys recognize that one, you don't need a hyperlink on it!) The sudden mood shift irritated me and I, almost immediately, ensured the yell machine was shut.

A couple of prominent thoughts popped up! Who really is a "hero"? And, why such silly songs that do not do any good than just keeping the human mind entertained?

We have associated the word "hero" to the reels projected on screen. He is that person who fights for justice, loves genuinely, handles issues courageously, protects his people from danger, does the right thing come what may. On a lighter note, he is that person who can fight a hundred villains single handedly (especially in Telugu movies), who can bite a bullet, speak pages of script in one shot that presumably inspires people around him and is as worthy that people worship his foot steps!!!

Well, who then is a real life hero? I immediately told myself, "Of course my dear Lord!! Well all those descriptions of a hero fit Him like a glove custom made, don't they?! He is everything positive, all powerful, all pervasive, all knowing and omniscient! He can do more than bite bullets - He can transcend life and touch hearts. He can drown mountains in His infinite compassion and protect His dear from all negativity. He is Om, the eternal energy and the Source of all life. He is... "

The calling bell goes and my glory song is interrupted! I had to pull my stream of thoughts back to its kitty before I could decide my reflex. And then I raised and walked to the door, hoping it was my mom to give me a better cup of ginger honey tea!!

Well, Surprise Surprise!!  It indeed was the mother - not just mine but of the world! At my door step, stood My Master with an innocent smile that conveys a million meanings to million people. He looked up and I felt a whiff of cold air like I had opened a door with a blower over it. The scenes behind him were blurred for I couldn't see the elevator or the door of the opposite flat. So it is, when God arrives at your door step! The indefinite ebbs out to yield to the Infinite.

He walked into my quarters, so silently and simply, like He deserved no attention or regard. He settled down on my dirty couch, looked up and smiled at me, as I was still wondering how He suddenly decided to knock my door! He then asked, "So, should I make tea?" with a slight hint of His all knowing self.

"Hero, No!! I was just wishing.. I don't need it now. I helped myself."

"Hero? No one calls Me that... You don't like the conventional names I have, do you?!", He chuckled.

"Swami, It's not like that. I just felt You were the only one eligible to be called so - "Hero"".

"Oh yeah, I heard you say all those fancy English words!", with His usual charm in the voice.

"But Swami, Isn't all that true?! Aren't you all I said?"

"Well, if you say so! But I like it simple. Love. That summarizes all My qualities. And by the way, you are a hero at times too!"

"You seem to be in a very humorous mood, hero", I said lightly.

"Oh, I am quite serious. You are a hero too... But only at times. If you could love genuinely, you are a hero too. But there are lesser and lesser heroes today. Do you know?!"

Silence hit me. The insight in His words was still being decoded by my faculties. But He didn't let the seriousness of the words sink into me. He started off after a moment's pause, "So hero, Keep good and keep loving. I got to leave now."

"Hero", I began fumbling, "Would you mind telling me why You decided to knock my door today? I am happy You came, but I am equally perplexed."

"I responded to your knock, hero! You knocked My door, and so I decided to visit you."

"But Swami, what do you mean I knocked Your door??" I asked with all surprise!

"Didn't you let your love flow as you sang, Tere charanon mein sai mera koti pranaam? That genuine calling in love is a knock enough for me to respond."

"Wow!! Did that really reach You?! I sing every week for You."

"It did! And yeah, you sing every week for Me... But you aren't a hero every time... You understand what I mean, don't you?"

A thoughtful I responded, "Yes hero", and my eyes searched for His feet in all humility.

"Oh, My boy! Don't worry about not being a hero all the time. You will get there soon. I am with you."

My face lit up with a 1000 watts smile. The assurance was strong enough! My way ahead will be travelled with the Master himself, what more can I aspire for?!

And He chose that moment to say "See you again, My boy" and swanned towards the door. As he reached the door, He looked straight into my eyes and said, "Your second question on songs?? Let's speak soon." and winked!!

I shall not try to explain how I felt. It's beyond any language I know.

And we now know who's the hero!

Love,
Sri

While in the dark, He always is!

It was a breezy Sunday night with a strange lull... I finished my day's routine and was walking back home,  late hours by Indian standards. The bhajans I had heard that evening, the one that I had sung were playing loops in my mind.

But, in all this silence, something within kept telling me there was someone just following my footsteps, like a a leopard stealthily tracking a deer. But I am no deer, bear in mind and if I am one, I am an exception - I confront than run! I stopped and turned around and saw this old man making slow yet confident steps towards me. He was no threat to me - I knew immediately, for he didn't hesitate a second to smile at me like he knew me for decades.

I felt quite like an (oxy)moron then I tell you, I did not know what reactions my body and mind were sending out. But I settled to smile back, and when I did, he said, "Can I join you until you reach?", in this loving authoritative voice! (Oxymoron, yeah?! )

I waited for him to come near me and trust me, he just wasn't impressive! Clothes a few years old, a beard untamed for more than a week, a bend that told me he must be late eighties and hair that spread out in every direction mentioned in a Mariner's compass. In spite of all this, there was something about him that made me listen to him... what,  I still haven't understood.

I pulled the emergency chain on my train of thoughts and responded, "Well, you can! But how do you know where I am going?!"

"Ha ha!! I just live around here... And I know you won't live past my area." I so much wished I give him mokka by going in a completely different direction from his house.

We walked in utter silence for a few minutes, with me guessing where he belonged to, and he smiling at the nasty pup sleeping by the road. After a few steps I asked, "You actually scared me, how long have you been following me?"

"Well, I have been following you for a long time. Rather not get lost in darkness. You have been guiding me!"

A sense of ego set in my mind and with a slight hint of pride, I said " What would've happened if I wasn't here? How would have you gone home?"

"I don't know... But I knew you will come this way."

Summa scene podraan paaren! "But how did you know I would come? Have you seen me here before?"

"Yes, I have. I have seen you around for a while now. I know you, don't you know me?!"

I was reminded of SV Shekhar's dialogue, "Ivaru periya Uganda naatu adhibaru", "No, I don't. I have been here for long too!" I responded in a pretty irritated tone.

He giggled and said, "If you haven't seen me, you probably haven't been seeing enough!! I catch your attention momentarily, don't you think?! Yet, you say you haven't seen me."

In all this, I saw two street dogs wagging their tails and circling his feet. He probably was right... Even the dogs seemed to know him.

A calm uneasiness set in me - for me, this man suddenly started sounding mystic, intriguing. He looks pauper, he speaks vague, but there sure was something I wasn't recognizing. But I did not feel like pursuing the conversation anymore - my mind built its defence of  my high rated personal image. And he seemed to know it.

"You would turn here, won't you? I got to keep heading straight. I will see you later, yet another dark night eh?!" he gave a wide grin and heaved forward.

Chills... People call it, though it heats up your brain up thro' the spine! Most people were (oxy)morons I was convinced! I waved bye at him, and said "Nice company! Have a good night!!"

"Yes I am good company!" he smiled and moved further. And as he moved, he was humming a tune that seemed so known to me...

I took my turn and opened the gates, still wondering what song he was humming... and as I entered my home,  I knew what it was... He was humming my favourite bhajan, the one I had sung that evening,
"Prem Ishwar hai, Ishwar Prem hai
Har Dhadkan mein Tu hi samaa hai
Ishwar Prem hai... "

And as I lay in bed, a flurry of thoughts flooded my mind about this unique encounter. And when I let all those thoughts settle, I saw in the calmness of the moment, what I had not known until then. And as dawn broke, it did break in me too... the hidden messages of my strange companion!

And if you are someone with deep trust in Him, get back and read the conversation for yourself!!

Deeply inspired by my heart's deepest desires and by "Conversations with God"...

Love, Sri!