Five months with the Poles

The Poles are interesting people.... trust me, they are. 

There is a standard notion about the Poles - the ones that don't so much smile; the ones that stare at different skin colours; the ones that can be quite complaining and mentally closed to anything non-Polish. I like bringing in a free look at people and things, and not get so carried away by presumptions and notions. I decided to try it out myself and it has been quite interesting how this is turning out to be... 

In the first few weeks of my stay here, I would have given an A+ to the guys that sent out those notions about this country. Yes, they were visibly "not so warm"; I have received strange looks at the tram stops and yes, some of my first conversations were not as pleasant as I would have liked. 

For any Indian, I believe diversity is in the mental fabric quite unconsciously. It starts from our gulli friends who speak different languages, school mates who bring different dishes to lunch, social groups that celebrate the same festival in a zillion varying traditions and college friends who introduce American sitcoms and world cinema. My fond memories of school life are the evenings with Joseph and his family, even celebrating Christmas with them and beating eggs to help his mom bake the plum cake I love! And all that experience builds a level of tolerance and understanding that "everyone I know doesn't have to be like me and I can still cooperate with him/her amicably". It naturally helps settle faster than any other homogeneous community with a multi-national corporate. 

Well, how is that relevant to this whole Poland story? It is... in how Poland is at the absolute other end of the spectrum on diversity. 95% of the population in Poland is ethnic, and almost the only religion in practice is Christianity. So a foreigner walking in Poland is like an American walking in Ambasamudram - you are sure to get stares, but you won't be asked for a selfies; the Poles like it done in stealth mode! 😎😉

Though most of us have known this country only due to the horrors of the Nazis during WW2, Poland had a troubled history even before the war. It was once the biggest European empire by geography and power and then silently vanished from the map for about a century - thanks to Germany, Austria and Russia that invaded it from all directions. It is, in fact, quite fascinating how they got back together a few decades before the world wars to become one unified country again. But history repeated itself during the WW, with both Russian and German troops trying to fringe into the country. Hitler orchestrated his most devious ethnic genocide in Poland. 

Hold on! But, why did Hitler target Poland for the genocide? That's a great question to ask... the Poles were a culturally open society and extremely warm to other nationals before the WW. They had the largest settlement of Jews in Europe and treated them with absolute respect and equal status in their society. Hitler clearly focused on his biggest catchment area - Poland, for his psycho intentions to destroy the ethnic race. A country with good intentions and noble kindness to a neglected race was an unfortunate victim to wars and hardship. No wonder the Poles would handle everything/one foreign with caution! 

Imagine how America would feel if another Twitter addict, billionaire claiming, partially literate hypocrite decided to run for President the next time! 😱😳😱The Poles have good reason to feel as freaked out with the rest of the world. As some of my friends here say, Poland has no true friends in the world. Just as diversity is woven in an Indian psyche, caution and doubt of intent is woven in the Poles - rightfully, due to the history and the turmoil their ancestors have been through not so long ago. 

Yes, the Poles will take time to trust; they will take time to understand your true intentions; and yes, they are shy and humble people who think what could go wrong first before what could go right.. And, I think they deserve to be understood for thinking and acting the way they do. But when they do realize our sincerity, nothing stops them from opening their hearts and homes to foreigners. 

I have had some amazing times here with good friends and their families. My friends here arranged a bachelors' for me in short notice when they knew I was getting married, they invited me home for Christmas dinner when they knew I was spending it alone and Polish Santa even gave me gifts! 😆😆😆😆

I have a few more months to go here, and I am sure I will have a lot more great memories of living in this land with its loyal people. I have my interesting anecdotes settling here, but those for another time. Happy New Year, and may the best come your way! 

Love, 

Sri

Rant of the moment!

As I complete living almost half the lifespan of my generation, I have come to realise, like many of my contemporaries, that I am probably not living how I would ideally love to, and equally acknowledge that I don't push myself hard enough out of my settled space to start living the way I love to. It is quite an endless vicious cycle, so to say.

I am currently on a flight from Chennai to Mumbai.. and I am scribbling all this down in offline mode on my silly Moto X. So, what triggered me to write against the mighty struggles of a hefty​ neighbour pushing my elbows off the armrest, a scarce board to rest my hands on and the company of an empty Maggi masala cup?!

Well, the reason is this intriguing conversation I had with a stranger uncle (sometimes wonder if I should call such ppl ‘brother’, my hairline is just an inch better) at the Higginbothams store in the Chennai airport. My primary intent: kill time. Every time I touched a shining book, my rather sarcastic mind reminds me of many such in my cupboard, still shining. And there, my stranger friend was perusing some books too, he took one and said to himself, “I didn’t know this author was a Nobel laureate”. I said to myself, “ You knew this author existed?!” What is your business listening to him, you might ask. And that shows, you have never visited this store in our airport. It's like the hand-wash in Adyar Ananda Bhavan - 3 basins in the place of 1 and inevitably, you sometimes get so close to another that you even hear what they are thinking in their minds! (#Detour: Reminds me of the words in my office elevator: Avoid unwanted body contact 😅😅)

He probably had the same intents as me in that store, but then he must have been inspired seeing me looking at books like I was Chitti, intensely scanning the contents. He smiled and said, “So do you have any suggestions?”. I said, “Well, I am looking for new releases by Robin Sharma or Mahatria.” He said, “Aah okay…” I elegantly floated out of the store and stood by the boarding gate, wondering about this conversation. His question, and my response had zero relevance, an absolute zero.

And I started reasoning what had made me give such a response  - and this simple thing struck me… the monotony that our lives have become. 5 years back, I would have asked that person what his interests were and managed to build a decent conversation. But now, our human interaction abilities are diminishing primarily due to the monotony and the borders we prefer to stay within. The forced exposures to the society and new people during my college, school days and internship years are now gone. Today, I choose whom to interact with and to what extent. My only new exposures are colleagues at work, and how I interact is almost defined by his/her professional relationship with me - as a customer, peer, subordinate or manager. As much as I try to be genuine, the interaction will not be fully expressive - in the confines of the pseudo free corporate environment.

I only wish I get better at dealing with such situations, and I also wish Higginbothams has enough space to avoid such collisions. More pertinently, I wish I live the “present” moment as I aspire and be more focussed on what I am saying and doing “now”. And that my folks, is my karuthu for the day!

PS: The inquisitive me went around the store 20 mins later to check what my stranger friend had purchased. He had 3 books in his hand. The look on his face and the title of books somehow reminded me again of my shining collection. 

Happy storing, friend!! 👍👍